somebody asked me if i had abandonment issues

what the hell does that mean?

i will have more trips to the bathroom or diet colas than I will have days in my life; why is it an ‘issue’ if i don’t want to waste them on being alone?

every sickness has been made normal and every normal human need made sick by the marketing machines that support capital

just

barely

hanging

on

Thank god it’s still grey and rainy outside. Unfortunately, the clouds are all expected to disperse before too long. I don’t quite know what to do with myself; I feel like I used to feel when I was an undergrad and rode my bike to school, on the mornings when I decided halfway there that I wasn’t going to go to class after all.

I would suddenly find myself sitting somewhere in the middle of the east side, miles from anything interesting in either direction, just apartment buildings and 7-11 stores everywhere, with no definite plans and a morning to kill, feeling slightly guilty and slightly off-kilter, and quite as though I was destined to waste the time to no good purpose.

—

The caffiene isn’t helping at all.