
For the first few days of this week, it worked alarmingly well in the one area just mentioned—getting me to work on my dissertation every day. For the first time in over a year, I have made substantial academic progress once again on my own (rather than someone else’s) work, despite being incredibly overloaded. I have been almost giddy with excitement.
Today, however, the task list forced the habit tracker out of my day while I struggled to keep up with promises I’ve already made to far too many people to do far too many things. The tension is back; there are the things that matter, and then there are the things that I’ve promised to do. Though the promises often seem necessary in any number of ways that I can rationalize, I wonder if it’s time for me to stop promising so many people so many things.
I need to invest more time in the future and less time in the present.
The only problem is that it’s unclear to me whether I can maintain current earnings levels without maintaining current promise levels. I guess this is what they call the treadmill.
As an aside, posting here is one of the habits I’m tracking, and the basic reason why I’m sitting here writing this right now rather than going to bed. There’s a fine line between silly self-domination and transcendental self-liberation.
