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Well, in a move shockingly reminiscent of a U.S. invasion of Iraq that actually empowered Iran (of whom we should have been much more afraid), the U.S. and Israel have now in the space of a few short weeks manage to unite the previously antagonistic-toward-one-another Hezbollah (who disapproved of the 9/11 attacks on the U.S.), Al Qaeda, and Hamas.

Shall we see if we can support a little more violence against innocent civilians and maybe get a few more terrorist organizations to join forces under the same banner? Maybe we could boil some Arabic children alive, kosher, and have them at a combined Seder—stars-and-stripes-themed weenie roast?

Christ.